Happy Birthday Loser

After a hard day of cutting firewood in the rain, the family and I went for supper at Boston Pizza. The meal was good, however somewhat pricey, considering that it was just pizza and not a gourmands delight. I suspect they have to pay Howie Mandell for those annoying ads, seeing he can’t find any other work. That however is not the focus of todays observation of life.

While we were having our meal I observed and heard on three separate occasions (and this is not isolated to only Boston Pizza), the assembling of the staff and the singing of happy birthday to some unfortunate customer. Upon reflection of this I pondered the state of mind of the server who has to sing this ditty numerous times each shift. Poor, poor soul. Even poorer is the loser to whom the song is directed or the smutz who requested the staff to do so. I suspect that most of the requests come from friends or loved ones who want to embarass the birthday boy or girl and cannot come up with an original idea of how to do so. So they request the staff to sing Happy Birthday and pat themselves on the back for coming up with something so cunning and devious. Let me give you some advice. If you want to embarass your buddy, stand up and sing it yourself or better yet dance on the table and do a strip tease. You should probably wait until after the meal and before you pay to do the striptease, as this will surely get you an invitation to vacate the premises. Believe me, I know how to get kicked out of places. At any rate this will show some originality, and will relieve the servers from from tedium of performing like singing hoars a dozen times a night.

If you are one of those individuals who who finds wit in this particular type of performance , I have only this quote from Homer: “Welcome to Loserville……population….you.”

Am I the last bastion of rational thought in the free world? I thought so.

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